Education or taming

I’m use to be asked about supernany, this make me to write about the education.
Educate is not easy and there’s not a shortcut to do it, human beings learn observing another person, by consequences and what they are taught
We can make ourselves questions about this. What kind of person do I want my kids to be when they grow up? What is really important? What values I want them to have? As we answer we will have the way.
I have two little kids and I know very well how complicate is educate them, how bad I feel when they suffer and even so I have to keep on making what they don´t want, and sometimes they make me so angry that I cry them, but thanks to them I have learn a lot about human beings and what really mind.
There are two ways to face the first years of a kid, one is to educate being conscious, you need to really want and sacrifice sometimes. The other is taming, teach to obey, but do we really want our kids to obey when adults? Or we prefer they to think on their own?.
Another point are the limits, of course, the limits are necessary (I don’t allow my kids to jump by the window, or throw stones to kitties… common sense helps a lot in this area), and we are responsible of their behavior when in public (I have the use of not allowing them to disturb another people), but I don’t think education consist only in putting limits What it really mind is what I do. If I want my kids to be respectful, I have to be it myself. If I want them to be happy I have to teach them what is really important. If I want them to be sensitive with another people I have to be sensitive with them and show them how I feel and why, how them feel and why.
Rewards and punishment can be of use to something in particular but human beings are very complicated to manipulate them that way
The other day I was told about a girl who was jealous because she had had a brother like if this would have be a terrible problem to the mother, the problem is to the poor little girl who has not enough skills to deal with her feelings, the mother has to make her to understand there is love enough to both. When a kid has a brother or sister is logical and natural to feel weird, change is always complicated to deal with, children have little experience so everything is more frightening to them than to adults, a program of rewards and punishment is not going to help a kid to deal with the feelings but teach to hide them so the education fail because a principal roll of parents is to teach how to deal with feelings.
A good idea is to be on their feet, remember how we thought on their age, give them what they really need. Let them play in the park and forgetting about all this important things they have to learn to be adults of success (you know, quantum phisic and chinese). There is time to everything but what children need really is to play and our obligation is to give them time to do it, maybe we would like to do another thing but at the end it was us who decide to have the kids, so we have to face our responsability